I feel like I'm in dance class right now
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
