Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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