Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Randomize
