His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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