I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
