I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
