just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Randomize