Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
