Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
