Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
