lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
zippers are such a cool invention
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Well I just put wine in my tea
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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