Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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