Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
