grandma shit on top of the toilet
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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