She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Dicks are not precious.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize