what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
