Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
