No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
