wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
