thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
