We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Randomize
