my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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