looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
