That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
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