Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
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