Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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