and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize