Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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