That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Randomize