im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
