Redeem this text for a blowjob
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
