i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Everclear isn't food dammit
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
