We're like a lot better than the average bears
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
