I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
