Duck Duck Cougar?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
