Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
