What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
