Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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