i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
