I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
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