hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
