Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize