nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
