i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize