All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
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