i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
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