i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
