she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
