NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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