Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
