Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
