He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
